Friday, December 30, 2005
campfire burning in the dark dark night!
okay okay. let me calm down from my emo climax.
was suppose to be back at school ytd morning.
but something cropped up in the morning so yeahh.
had to stay to help out.
so i reach home at around noon. and slept all the way till 5 plus.
so i made my way back to camp again.
campfire pit only half done !
so i help to rush and there it was.
done at about 7 plus.
dinner time!
during the wash-up.
the instructors had to rehearse their performance larr.
i shld say it was rather special lar.
so campfire started! at around 8.30
emcee emcee!.
shall just highlight the more interesting part right!?
shall say it was the skit?
it is bout the sentosa advertisement used long ago.!?
they editted it and there it is. a new advertisement.
it definetely brought lots of laughter for evryone.
another top class hit of the campfire was the I ask my love.
i have never heard of a version lyk that lar..
so... corny.
-.-"
and the linger song?
never heard of it through out my np life.
the last part of the whole campfire was definetely the most enjoyable part of the whole campfire lar.
the dance session.
you can ask anyone to be your partner and dance to the music.
so romantic right. imagine dancing by the beach.
i dun have the mood currently into this stuff.
so sorry if i am a spoil sport.
lucky i still have rachel with me right!?
i still prefer a quiet and peaceful environment better.
we had a debreif by christine ma'am.
all about all the camp.
she thought us this.. mind clearing technique.
did u ever know that ur brain is made up of 2 different section?
a part is used for numbers and knowledge. while the other is mainly used for memories. visual effects and stuff.
there is this test to how it works.
i shall try to post it here.
first you have to think of 1 special person that is important in your life, a family member, and a close friend.
now have a favourite number of yours in mind. the current time (minutes), lastly the favourite number of anyone you know.
now try to match each number to a person.
now whenever u recall of a person in your mind. say out the number.
now think of the numbers, and say out the person that is matched with the number.
having trouble?
dun worry. its natural.
our brain cant really multitask, as much as we thought we could.
moral of the story.
2 heads work better than one.
TEAMWORK!
actually there is so many things to blog about.
arhh. but anyway. i am in a rush to go.
shall go for a walk by the beach.
alright alright. shall end here.
still have to wake up early tml and head down to school.
I MISS MY CAMPERS~
and the instructors. :P
Into each life some rain must fall, some days be dark and dreary.
The course of love is never smooth, expect difficulties, overcome it and true love awaits.
``Sun Sets at : 12/30/2005 12:48:00 AM
Thursday, December 29, 2005
Be miserable, or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done. It's your choice.
now i starting to get tied down to life again.
training was great.
i meann, i dint manage to get a wink last night before leaving home.
but then again, i manage to strive on through till i reach my camp site.
went thru normal drills revision.
then carried on with the fancy rifle drills.
well, to me, its still memories that still vividly run through my mind.
but anyway. now that something are finalise.
things that have a good start, will have a good end.
oh yeah. lunch at kfc was definetely hilarious right wj?
overturning the whole tray, and there goes his lunch.
but never mind. it gives you a lesson for laughing at people, and not focusing right!?
walk a long way back home. i mean to the bus stop.
from school to that wj hse.
-.-"
so i dint went home and grab my stuffs before i leave home again.
reach the campsite bout around 8?
it was the mock campfire programme.
lucky for me, i was in time.
so yeahh. went through all the songs.
i remember this " Five hundred Miles " song.
it was suppose to be sung in this low and sad pitch right?
but these campers.!?
they sing it so happily.
but anyway we did enjoyed ourselves right?
especially the instructors.
we had this girl and guy to sing duet for us ?
they joined singing school ok!?
i meann, yeahhh. jay chou is so famous!?
isnt it?!. so they sang jay chou's shan hu hai.
too bad they not in the same group.
if not campfire performance, they would most probably be the best right!?
and of course. how can only one song!?
there is a english song of cause.
give it a guess!?
a simple plan song.!
untitled~
and the atmosphere just so blend in to our moods.
imagine sitting by the beach. singing songs. the "swish" sound of the water.
so relaxed right!?
so yeahh. debrief again. and off we go for shower.
i mean them.~
so yeahh. the instructors agreed on a firedrill.
nothing special right!?
just normal assemble and head count. blah blah.
no missing people ehh!?
so relieve them off the "scolding"
and then~, the lights off!
so we instructors went back to our rooms and rest.
at about ... 1?.
i heard someone knocking at the door.
so i woke up. seeing all the others guys were still "pigging"
opened the door. and i am not surprised.
the whole bunch of girls are outside lah.
not the campers, but the instructors.
so we headed down to the BEACH AGAIN!.
did i mention!? the walk was rather ... far larr.
and err, ermmm...
i did not know that there were so many new "couples" within ourselves lar.
remember for the first day. the guys were with the guys and the girls were with the girls.
esap for the senior instructors lar.
rachel larrr!.
make me no partner. she had to leave for home first.
so... yeahh. i was the odd one out. going SOLO larr.
but the good thing that i was spared from all the "suanings".
had our briefing for today there.
cause later is the campfire!?
the pit shld be set up by 3 right!?.
just hope that swinging ball will scatter the sparks on the right spot.
if not it will just be a fire ball? right!?
and the last part was the instructors heart to heart session.
feedbacks were given. and nominatees for the awards was listed.
yay! cecilia! she managed to perform larr. well, that depends very much on later.
later shall be the last night for us. lets bring a good end to evrything.
omg. its 3!. and i am suppose to be back in school to pei jon and wj right!?
at 8!? i guess i am the only nocturnal one here.
but they do need their sleep. cause they still have a long day to go.
alright alright. i shall end here.
Happiness is the only good.
The time to be happy is now. The place to be happy is here. The way to be happy is to make others so.
``Sun Sets at : 12/29/2005 02:42:00 AM
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
today is definetely a day worth remembering.
nothing's gonna change my mind about it.
woke up rather early this morning.
wash-up, and there i go again. rotting in front of my com again.
received a mail from rachel. yeahh. she will not be back so early.
so shld not be able to be there for her arrival.
around 1?. the guys came.
lolo, wj, and jonathon.
hanhui joined us later.
yeah yeahh. watch movies.
chicken little, sky high, and eye10.
between the movies of cause, were some gaying moments.
but thenn. my uncle prepared dinner.
had we had dinner together!.
thats a 3 course meal right!?
a drink, the main course and dessert.
I-SCREAM!!!!!!!!!!!!
yeahh. felt so "HOME"LY.
though we are lyk a band of brothers right.
and what we call ourselves?. the MAIN 5?
i thot shld be 6?... but anyway.
it shall be precious memories. isnt it?
today is suppose to be a day for me to relax.
argghhh. i guess i am running a fever though.
decisions decisions. all we had to do in life is to make decisions.
what about the time given then.
already i had so much things to worry for.
its my responsibility and i understand that point.
people just dun understand.
and the first thing they had to say to me, was that i am trying to be rude or irresponsible by not replying messages.
even without giving me a chance to explain myself?
this is what we call "understanding"?
i have my responsibility and i ought to stand by it.
maybe i cant even make it for the last day of camp because of something more important.
haiz.
yeahh. chatting with rachel now on the phone.
at last someone to hear me out for today.
or am i the one lending the listening ear.
but since u just came back. shall let u have most of the talking .
anyway, its been a long time since we have talked on the phone right?
so now, u must be happy. right!?. RIGHT-ED!.
another one tempting me about australia.
-.-"i had enough lar!
i missed out a whole day of CAMP!
guess today they must have fun right?
arhhh. i miss those campers.
and the instructors of course.
guess i shall get u guys lunch right?
i try i try. :D
i shall stop here.
guess i shall blog maybe tomorrow night?
since i should be bringing my laptop along.
take care evryone~
To let true love remain unspoken, is the quickest route to a heavy heart.
``Sun Sets at : 12/28/2005 01:39:00 AM
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
christmas was a boxed out.
the night life of orchard was so much different.
so "snowy" so packed.
people treated evryone with great hospitality.
if spraying snow foam on their face is?
but overall it was fun.. isnt it?
watched narnia!.
a great show i must say, dont say its kiddy.
some kind of tales type of movie.
watched with my da jie, ah seng and jm.
had dinner in this Central restaurant at taka.
then spent the rest of christmas over at kam seng's hse.
dun ask me how much i enjoyed it.
probably asked me how i enjoy sleeping the night away.
so here am i blogging again.
if you notice, evrything is so point form right?
probably because i learn something from the camp.
short and sweet~
just crapping.
anyway. i am back from the camp to enjoy my sleep on my cosy bed.
jealous right OUTS' instructor?
i shall be back to join you guys tml bahhh.
the camp so far was great isnt it?
those campers kept their mood high.
omg. this year theme for group name is so...
give it a guess?! anyone!?
designer goods!?
and its like.. i thought prada, LV, and blah blah.
nike, adidas?
NO!
they came up with all sorts of stuff.
there is this quicksilver, stussy.
-.-" isnt it kinda "in"?
today, there is still critical thinking session.
and i meann.. nowadays people are much shorter right?..
but there is still girl.. during one of the games.
the rescue mission.
she lead the whole team through the obstacles so quickly.
you may think what is the big deal?.
the obstacles are rather tall lah..
we expected the guys to do the job.
but this girl just surpise us.
Cecilia right!? i remember.
i do like the name. sounds so femine.
:D i had some time with the campers.
of course the debrief session was so mine session like always.
girls nowadays are so much more active lah.
guys so quiet.
nvm. i shall be there to push those guys.
cannot lose out to da girls.!
instructors unite~
sentosa's night view is just so b.e.a.u.tiful.
after setting up the night games for today.
the instructors had games ourselves lahh.
highlight of the whole session was the true or dare part.
instead of the most common " personal" question.
examples "Who you like" kinda question.
question asked gave us a choice.
"IF" was added to the question.
i remember this question post to me.
IF you must choose one of the girls here to be your partner, who will it be?
RIGHT!? nick?.
anyway. we had so much fun. ever tried doing the adrenaline rush in the sea?
how?! the guys do it the "Hiong" way lahh. we chiong down into the sea. and run against the current.
COLD!! night breeze huhh!?
alas. my firemaking skills still there huh?
i made a fire from the branches and leaves.
of course, not the cavemen method.
i mean by matches. :p
so we had this sharing session right.?
i shall not say that i am good in consoling people.
but at least. what i say do help right!?
december a blossom month for love and affair.
evryone is so tied down.
nevermind. to all the OUT instructors out there.
if you need a listening ear. i will be ever ready for you.
rachel is coming back~
tommorow right!?
my partner!
muahahaha. if i can make it. i would be there at the airport.
and we shall make our way down to sentosa together!?
but before evrything. guess its a long time since we visited our mOonluft le right?
so before evrything. must go and do something we have not done for a month or so.
it will be our 57 time right!?
liying*da jie: hmmm. sorry lahh. i dint meant to curse u de.
but anyway. do take care of yourself ok?
i shall lend you the vcds to keep you entertained through the 2 weeks bahh.
if it is really 2 weeks lah.
:P. CHICKEN POX!
alright. shall end here. still got plenty of stuff to go work on.
take care everyone~
i am not the guy worth your love.not worth the time waiting.but i still hope you would find your mr.right soon.When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us.
``Sun Sets at : 12/27/2005 03:17:00 AM
Saturday, December 24, 2005
Yesterday was the happiest day of the month!
suddenly i felt so contended with my life.
i finally get to see the rainbow after the storm.
and it is really b.e.a.u.tiful.
yesterday night, i had a most peaceful sleep this month.~
without waking up in the middle of the night and grab a drink.
yesterday went up with my da jie!
we went to suntec CITY to find job.
LOl. why emphasise on city?
will elaborate later.
so yeahhh.. we walk through citylink and made our way to suntec.
before that we had lunch at fountain terrace
actually was suppose to be at the stalls before the foodcourt.
but.. oh well. it was a friday! and feel like eating vege.
so yeahh.
thanks for tempting me arh!? LOlz
then we went for the interview.
its like alot of people!?
mostly older than us. dun think we will get the job.
cause the others all more experience than us.
so anyway. we filled the form and went to the arcade.~
both of us wanted that chip and that kitty lahhh..
too bad.. it was not a lucky day ytd.
the staff there.. shifted the prize to right at the "hole" for a couple who was spending
quite alot of money on the machine. and yeahhh. they got it.
we were like... OMG? like that also can arhh.. not fair!
LOlz. but nvm lahh.. imagine that we were themm.. we would be happy wont we!?
so we made our way down to ... chinatown for coffee talk again~
my da jie treat me ok!? so yeahh. the coffee was great.
just too bad i could not have the mandarin toast bread.
when i get a job.. and my pay.. i will definetely bring u go shopping de!~
its a promise. :D
then we went walking around chinatown since it was rather early...
went to see toys.. BARBIE dolls.
rather.. cute lahh. i am so envious of the small kids nowadays..
their toys are lyk.. so nice ~
right da jie? though u seem so interested in it also.
LOlz. chocolates! there were many of them. too bad..
i not feeling very well. if not i would stack up on these at home.
thennnn....
we went down to town again.. as she was meeting her sister.
as we were walking.... guess what?
TWO PERSON were in our way lahh.. and when we finally look at them..
we realise it was claire and xueling...
MY BRUDDA!!!
so.. yeahh. claire suggested to go shopping together.. and so we went to far east's burger king to have a talk right?
and that is when the CITY comes in.. we were argueing about having shortcuts.
and.. its only the 2 of us argueing lahh. liying and xueling was lyk.. shaking their heads.
LOlz!. talked for about half and hour before we parted.
xueling going to her.... relative hse right? if i am not wrong that is.
and we sent liying safely to her sister's hand.:D
and we move on to mango.
cause mango used to be a shopping area for me lahh..
I AM NOT THE ONE DOING THE BUYING.
its just.. yeahh. that rachel AGAIN.
so yeahh. there is this 50 percent discount so i brought my brudda there~
she choose 3 blouses at first. but finally decided on a blue one.
yeahhh. that one was nice.. cause it was blue.~ lol.
and so... we went on... to WHEELOCK.
listen.. WHEELOCK.
right brudda? LOlz...
RIGHT-ED!
we walk around.. had a cheese cake and peppermint latte with mocha..
nowadays for christmas.. there peppermint drinks out there is great..
get one of them if u are passing by yeahh?
so.. we talk for a bout 3 hrs plus plus?
and finally went home..
i sent brudda home.. so can talk more on the way mahh..
there is just so much to talk about.
from NP to personal stuff, to gossips, to "regrets".
and so.. i went home myself.. like of cause..
though it shld be the most unhappy part..
but nevertheless..
i still find it worthwhile..~
cause today i went out with.. 3 da mei nu right!??
felt so honoured!
LOlz.
liying*dajie: if u are reading this.. must remember our promise hor..! cannot ps me.. must go study together overseas~promise arhhh!?. thanks for being there for me throughout this whole month!
and for your coffee yeahh? i wont forget to bring u out for shopping after i get my pay de.. so it will be shopping the the da jie and xiao di. right!!??? we will catch that that chip and kitty. :P without you by my side this month, i guess i would have broken off long ago. so a really big thank you~ must remember this xiao di of yours ok? i will remember you for the "* da jie" u have been to me. :D
claire*brudda: yeahh. i know you will be reading this. LOlz. thanks for lending me a listening ear 24/7 arhh? though like u said.. u used to gave rubbish. but... what i really need is just someone to listen and no matter what.. u were there.. be it with the rubbish anot.. :P .not the past, not the future , but right here right now? yeahhh.. will remember this phrase as much as i remember you.. bruddaS forever~ yeahh. cannot forget our promise arhhh.
rachel*: yeah yeahh. i wont forget you de.. you were the one that have been supporting mentally all the while right..!? too bad you are not in singapore.. if not.. maybe we can go out together!
but nevermind.. u were still there to support me, giving me advices.. so.. a big thank you to you.and dun forget my stuff before u come back arhhh! mOonluft-moOnluft. rocks! :)
to the np mates, "mostly the np girls!": yeahhh. so hard to forget. those memories.. just so memorable.. dun worry. we will always be the 10th batch..till now and ever.. maybe shall organise a outing real soon?till we meet again. take care!
LoLo, Hanhui: these guys.. jokers during work. but when they really get serious.. its a totally different story. these guys rather understands me.. and were also all the while giving me advices right... i understand, and as much as i want to heed ur advices.. i am just too sturborn.
for nvm.. one fine day.. we shall go play bowling together ok? LOlz
weijen, jon,mh: these ppl arhh... without themm. guess i wont be so crappy and all that. these guys are filled with crap. making us laugh whenever and whereever we go...so stay crappy yeahh!?
xinghui: surprised right? got your name? LOlz. thanks for the tempting arhhh!.
but too bad. i had a good determintaion.:D btw.. thanks for sharing your photos and ur trip with me !. though it is more like tempting me. but anyway. still ok lah. sometimes, you would lend me a listening ear too, so you are also in the list ok. and.. take care of your backbone lahh. dun visit ttsh so often. :P
angie(evil june twin, brothers and sisters): i know u have been waiting.. wait very long le hor?
LOLz. so here it is... maybe i still dun know you quite well, so hard to guess at times, what are you thinking about.but dun always add on problems to yourself ok? rest assured. our promise is still on. take care k? i will still be here for you always... as your twin!. :D
to the rest: there is just so many to be name right?like jm, ben, jimm,zm, etc. and if i had to name them all. you will have such a long time reading. so.. here. to the rest i have missed out. a big thank you for being there in my life.~ and dun worry. we will always remain friends.. forever~
to all of the above.. a merry christmas and have a good day ahead.
always remember one thing... though we may have graduate. but we are always friends.!
and i nearly forgot. my family and my dearest sister!
take care of yourself overseas ok? and dun forget my stuffs too. :P
with the 3 most important girls* and a wide and close circle of friends.
evrything is enough. guess what i really want is just someone to be there for me
when i need them. it is enough.
and with these friends, i would know it would be possible.
maybe what i really want to find is not love, it is just everlasting friendship.
Love? maybe i would wait for the perfect and ideal partner of my life before i start again.
till thenn. i would still depend on my friends right? RIGHT-ED!!
FRIENDs FOREVER and EVER!
``Sun Sets at : 12/24/2005 10:33:00 AM
Friday, December 23, 2005
its like close to 6 am in the morning and i still cant seem to get to sleep?
been browsing thru my mail.
and finally i can read the mail. my dearest sister.
hmmm. opera house?
hunters valley and snowy mountain.
arhhhh. i wish i was there.
but nevertheless. hope you have fun there kk?
i wonder if all the asthmatic people are having the same problems.
i only have breathing difficulties when i am lying down.
counting back. its been a week since i had my peaceful sleep.
so now drinking a cup of pearl earl tea.
i am here blogging.
what a great time to blog right?
since it is also about day time in aust now.
just replied to rachel's mail.
take care of urself while heading over to goldcoast ok?
though it should be rather bored there.
take pictures for me!.
know it's rather cold there.
so remember to wear a windbreaker around ok?
have not done anything much yesterday..
so not much to blog about.
but today.. i am going to go for a interview.
wish me luck ok?
hopefully can get the job.
then i would be able to go shopping~
alright alright. guess i shall...
i shall try to get to sleep.
right? RIGHT-ED !
When you cry, i'll wipe away all of your tears.When you scream, i'll fight away all of your fears.And i've held your hand through all of these years.But, you still have all of me.
``Sun Sets at : 12/23/2005 05:43:00 AM
Thursday, December 22, 2005
i am back again.~
let me see. there are many events going on right?
first is my da jie's birthday.
went out to celebrate with mostly our class peeps right?
played pool.etc.
the cake was nice lahh. really. by clayton.
got her face there lor. OMG. dun know where to put the candles.
and ohh. went out with my da jie for coffee talk right?
thanks for lending me ur ear.
though i am suppose to lend mine. :P
yeah yeahh. pak tor mate. :D
nxt time shall go out pak tor again. right?
looking forward lor. then can have coffee to drink and chat again. besides its free.
why? cause she treat mahh. hor da jie? LOlz.
thenn went chalet!!
dint stayed for the first night but i did for the second.
not much of a highlight. other than the night cycling part.
we cycle to tampines. then changi village.
and OMG. we saw gays..
they were lyk super chio lahh.
but then again. their voice give evrything away.
had mac's in the morning before we all left for home sweet home.
and that is ytd.
i dint really went back to sleep.
instead i went down to the airport. yeahh. i know its lame.
i got a mocha. and just walk around the airport..
OMG. the airport has so many shops.
i am starting to become a country pumpkin .
no way. i wan to go abroad.. by hook or by crook.
just at 10. i went to the airport again. to send my sis off. yeahh
she is going australia.
will be missing her.
cause. the house is so quiet.
besides. my parents is leaving too.
so i shall be so lonely at home.
lonely christmas that really is.
do come back soon ok. my sister.:D
thats about it for my daily life.
so many memories just suddenly flood my mind.
my NP life, my past memories like my class , etc.
thinking back. time really flies.
still remember the time we would stay back after school as a punishment for not passing up homework.
its really memorable.
malaysia is having some problems now right?
lyk floods?
OMG. the sale is going on. but there is this stupid flood that keeps us away.
unlucky. maybe go genting highlands .
maybe maybe maybe.
Evanescence's song just suits my feelings now.
my immortal, bring me back to life. and blah blah.
i'm starting to have regrets now.
and its lyk been such a long time before i do.
but nevertheless. something got off worries.
rachel sent me a mail.
yeahh. she told me of the conditions there.
rather chaotic. just that some things were not reported.
only the citizens there know.
its so cold there lahh. the range is from 18 to 23.
but she said it always fluncuate around 20 degrees and below.
its lyk having the aircon on the whole day.
so she is staying at home all the while.
if u are reading this. dun be so bored ok?
we can always talk thru mails.
though its rather slow but ok. still can company each other right?
come back soon alright?
hopefully the wish written on the cardboard at the explanade would happen.
only those who were there that day on liying's birthday would know right?
but.. to the readers. you may wish to make a visit to the explanade and write down ur wish there.
:D
love is just like a chair standing only on two of its legs, sway a little and it will tumble.a picture paints a thousand words?
words have boundless meanings behind them.
given a choice. would you prefer a picture or just words?
words may be simple, being plain and simple would actually mean happiness.
but have u wondered.
what is actually the hidden coda behind evry picture.
behind evry picture actually binds with them the artist's innermost feelings.
never to be expose. never to be made known.
would you give the happinness to others, or keep it for yourself.
a choice to be made would meant sacrifice.
regrets? are they really part and parcels of life?
maybe there will be no regrets, only after we learn how to cherish the things around us.
a thousand miles, a thousand miles, a thousand miles, a thousand miles.
if u hear the whistle blow, a thousand miles.
``Sun Sets at : 12/22/2005 02:27:00 AM
Monday, December 19, 2005
after a week.
life finally seems to be on the original track again.
or is it maybe. i am just getting too busy to even think again.
but anyway. still feeling rather sick.
but then again.. since i need my bread and butter so hard.
i need to work.
and. yeahh. found a part time waiter as a job.
so fun ok.
learn so many things.
must always place ur hands behind your backs. NOT IN YOUR POCKET. :P
and many stuff lahh.. the methods of serving food etc.
the people there are nice lahh. really help and guide us along.
without their help. we would not be able to get our pay.
right? RIGHT-ED.
some people are just so.. self centred.
though we suppose to serve them.. but not to the extend of.. commanding us around like dogs right.
arhhhhhh. but since i am working... cannot show attitude. must bear with it.. "REN!"
yeahh. LOlz. and that hanhui.
-.-"
he is just so despo lah.. keep looking for pretty girls..
too bad lah.. the pretty girls are at my table.. and i get to serve them.
are u jealous hanhui?
LOlz!!!
yeahh. did i mention.. the entrance of the staff is so damn zai.
the first "appetizer" is brought in by us.. and in the dish. there is this candle..
with the lights off atmosphere.. so romantic sia...!!
we have to walk around the restaurrant.. thenn. serve the food.
and omg.. the girl really damn pretty lahh...!
not the bride.. !
i meann... ok ok.. i am starting to feel despo. LOlz!
just kidding~
so yeahh. here goes my first $28 bucks..
arhhh.come grassroot club find me! LOlz. i will be there..
if there is a function that is.
hmmmm. the camp is approaching..
and i dun feel excited at all.
still hearing no news of
you.
haiz.. maybe i really deserve this bahhh.
my partner is not here.. SHE IS NOT HERE.
how can you expect me to be even.. in the mood for the camp.
i'll say it without you...
i'll say it without you.....
can't you feel my heart...
there is nothing i can do....
yeahhh. its getting so late..
i am so tired.. guess i shall turn in early for tonight.
thats all. will be back to blog soon again..
ciaos~
``Sun Sets at : 12/19/2005 01:11:00 AM
Thursday, December 15, 2005
uh huh. ytd was a busy day for me yeah?
had a so long talk with my sis.
been long since we had a time to talk to each other.
we went out at 6 to had breakfast together.
ROTI PRATAS.!
chatted on things, i never expected that i would have said out.
mayb blood is really thicker than water.
oh yes. headed to school!
again.. i miss school
teaching those little kids again just remind me of my times as a NCO.
but yeahh. they do mature and now. they are NCOs- to be.
weeee... my commands, drills and campcraft.
are still there lah.
will not say can remember all.
but just forget some detail here and there.
but now.
evrything is just back into my mind again.
thenn had lunch at kfc.
yeahhhh. we talk againnn. this time with my brudda and my sisterr.
so long yeahhh. thanks to the both of them for hearing out.
we all share our problems and stuff lah.
spent a few hours chatting.
then went down to suntec city to celebrate cheng xi's birthday.
i am so sorry yeahh.
i dint mean to be the spoil sport.
but... i really have a lot of regrets.
that fountain reminds me of someone.
and even that song "My Hump" was played..
my mind was so blank.
what if she decided to stay there and only come back during the release of results.
will i be so moody evry single day.?
MELVIN WONG. you are such a failure. and i totally agree myself.
i just so disappoint her to make her leave.
and i cant even bring myself to send her off.
maybe when she is gone. i really have to depend on the beach to share my problems with.
and ohhh... yeahhh. there is just so much things i wanna do to help.
but can i? do i have the authority?
i just feel that if i interfere in it. i would be climbing over the higher authority heads.
right? RIGHT-ED!
i really wanna help! just as much as i wanna help.
yeahhh. maybe what ai ling said is right.
i shld worry about my own problems even before i care for others.
cause for now. i cant even get out of the dark shadow.
what right have i got to help the others.
there is just so much for me to share with someone.
wonder who will be there.?
for now. only me, my diary and the beach shall know.
regrets, regrets, are they really part of life?
``Sun Sets at : 12/15/2005 01:25:00 PM
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
and its another day.
time flies huhh?
just recalling back.
my O's is only just a month ago.
through so many days of torment.
i finally have been thru everything.
yeahhh. my mind now is just as calm as the sea.
calm as it is. just hope it will remain like this forever.
yeahh. have been reading through books.
self enrichment !
this is what i have read from a book.
and i find it specifically interesting.
so here it goes.
Courtship?
Under our current system of courtship, men do most of the date-asking and women get to squish men fragile egos like fudgsicles on a los angeles freeway. I can reasonably conclude that men did not invent this system.
Conclusion anyone?
for my conclusion.
i can only say.
LIFE IS UNFAIR!
maybe that is the way of life.
and the way of living life is just like the rules and regulation board.
everything is stated, you just have to follow it.
yeahh. follow it.
for now. it's not unusual to find many companies hiring workers.
but how many of them actually do really employ students like us. who is waiting for our results.
they just open it up for us. but to me it seems. they dun really seem keen to employ any of us.
maybe thats the only conclusion i can made thru my experiences in job interview.
and for the not so lonely girl now at australia.
hope you are enjoy yourself there.
i am not depressed for any particular reason.
for now it is.
there is no reason at all.
i am just worried.
regrets regrets.
life is all about regrets.
been thinking.
if one day. scientists could ever make a breakthrough in inventing something that could understand what the other party is thinking.
there would not be so much conflicts between people.
the world would be much more peaceful.
not to think that maybe its invading of other's privacy.
i am still not used to maybe blogging my innermost thoughts here in my blog.
still believe in keeping things to myself.
and maybe shout it out at the beach?
i just got a feeling. people have their own problems to worry about.
why add more problems to others, rather than spending the time to think of a solution yourself.
yeahh. maybe its self-centred that way.
but i still prefer it that way.
blog is just too open. somethings just could not be better expressed than writing them down.
now. just reading through them makes me feel so childish in the past.
arhhh whatever it is.
i shall adapt to the changes.
bitter experience comes with the sweet tastes of memories.
i just dun understand. what are actually people thinking.
what are they thinking about?
maybe no one understands.
people never express their innermost expression.
One cant love to order.
maybe i got too carried out.
not out of love.
just out of frequency.
it affects me mentally, physically and emotionally.
but now.
just feel so numbed already.
maybe i should just wait for fate to appear and point out the partner for life.
okok.. shall get going with my home work.
arhhhhh. today is gonna be a fine and beautiful day.
never dwell on the past. just keep the experience in mind and advance in life.
never make a promise if u cant fulfill it.
it only make you feel more guilty.
right? RIGHT-ED
``Sun Sets at : 12/14/2005 03:20:00 AM
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
Just right from the start.
A road to the end.
When will our life ever end..
yeahhh. sinking into depression.
this is when escaping from reality and lying to urself really comes in handy.
for now. i dun feel any sorrow, any anger, any happinness.
or i know is that life to me.. is just so.. plain and dull.
have not smile for the whole damn day.
is that pathetic?
just feel so numbed.
life is unfair. RIGHT? RIGHT-ED!
so live life unfairly.
today i am suppose to be at the airport.
to be frank. i woke up at 9.
but this feeling just come to me?
what should i say when i meet u?
what will be ur reaction?
will u be happy ? or not..
just thinking of all this.
i just cant bring myself to face anyone.
i know, it is just a minor setback.
i am really trying my best to overcome it.
really... just wonder. the day u're back..
can i bring myself to face u again.?
ur message really meant alot to me.
just that one sentence.
maybe we really have the telepathy.
u know how i am feeling, and vice versa.
i know i made u very disappointed.
i just cant go past my self-barrier
just staying home makes me feel like anytime a quarel will be started.
i am just so afraid that i cant even sleep.
reason is.. i am just so worried that when i open my eyes.. my family members are no longer there.
just what if? it really happen.
i have never been given such a cold treatment.
evryone has been giving me the cold shoulder.
and to add to the fact.
people are still giving lewd comments about me.
christine ma'am send a mail to me.
read the details.
and ok. maybe what she said is right.
i need a break.
only through endurance and determination can a person succeed in life.
dun worry .. i will be back soon.
and for the final part.
yeahh. to whom it may concern.
no one can be there for u forever...
u need not think much about what u shld do now.
u only have to do what you have been thinking so far when the time comes.
and let nature take its course.
If ur choice is made. never have any regrets.
yeahh. life may be cruel. i agree.
but maybe u will find a world of ur own there.
may it be colourfull skys or darkest storms.
just be assure that we will always be right beside you.
there is just somethings, time cannot erase.
till now or after.
``Sun Sets at : 12/13/2005 03:11:00 AM
Monday, December 12, 2005
arhhh.
let me start from e beginning..
first time so lucky.
but yet. the first time when so many things came pouring into my life.
just a month..
maybe yet a week.
life just sucks.
an incident.. the camp.
totally spoil my mood to go for it.
if that promotion to you is really that important..
then so be it.. right from the start. i never even think of challenging u for the post.
and even if u did that...
there is no point into saying a girl right...
makes u so ungentlemanly.
thats really bullshit lahh.
who gives a damn even if u are rich?
so what? money can make the world go round?
PROVE IT. dun stand there boasting about the things that u want to implement to the camp.
show it to us..
dun just keep saying about others ok.
so what if chief camp..
u deem no respect from me.
now and forever.
life totally is sucky.
my whole family is into a state of cold war.
that is just so ...
nvm..
life this month is really happening.
till now i still cant find a job.
whats more.. into such a "bankcrupt" state..
going out without money totally is fun lahh.
determination.
just self consolation..
arhhh. whatever it is..
come on... let more things happen to me this month.
I WILL BE WAITING!
with arms wide open.
if u think i am pissed or something..
nope.. i am not...
arhhh. i am so sorry rachel.
not in the mood to exactly blog..
so will end here.
ciaos
``Sun Sets at : 12/12/2005 12:58:00 AM
Friday, December 09, 2005
againn, my job hunting fail.
ended up playing lan.
so went shopping for the rest of the day.
arhhh, chatted at burger king for so long.
LET ME TELL U SOMETHING IMPORTANT.
DUN PRESS THAT BUTTON~
LOL. nvm, after saying that.
it aint funny anymore.
and oh jonathon.
10 and a half day more. ehh and counting.
saying about that.
rush through the formation of it through my mind.
suddenly, i find myself indulging in the np critical thinking again.
arhhh, thanks to rachel ok.
she kept me accompanied throughout the night, or was it the other way round.
yeahh. she gave lots of ideas lahh. so credits must also go to her.
so be it. lets see how lah huh. if possible, then i post it here.
MY HOME WORK!.
lol.
let me see. i still have 2 task on hand, camp proposal and fancy drill formation.
arhhhh...!!
nvm. shld burn the midnight oil to rush them.
weeee, someone is going malaysia with me.
shall see if he still wants lah.
right ben? RIGHT-ED.
da xiao jie arhh, go beach nv jio me.
lol.
let me see. the pictures are nice lah.
but kinda blur.
anyway. u flying soon le right?
shall be there to send u by hook or by crook.
so dun worry ok?
arhhhh, life without you is gonna be so slow pace and boring ...
AGAIN!.
let the job hunting begin!
``Sun Sets at : 12/09/2005 12:26:00 PM
Thursday, December 08, 2005
i just notice something.
all my post are in the mid nights.
that means that i am turning so nocturnal.
but nvm.i still prefer life like this.
i mean, i am born as a SNAKE.
and snake are nocturnal animals.
arhhh. shall not crap anymore.
today, i mean yesterday.
woke up at 1?
got a call from my claire for lunch.
just nice, after slp i get to have my lunch.
so went down to tp for pizza hut.
yeahhh. we chatted. all about NP again.
but still, thinking back. the memories still kind of remain vivid to me.
and surprisingly, i still rememember the commands for drills.
LOlz. yeahhh. for nxt year recruitment, maybe a fancy drill squad would be set up.
most probably i would be back to help bahh.
yay!. my second time. but its just fun.
watch zathura.though its a bit ... childish.
BUT, overall. it was still a exciting movie lahh. I assume.
though it was really funny.
"You're such a dick". "What can u prepare ? Water!!?".
LOlz.go watch go watch. and you will know what i mean.
hmmm. had macdonalds for my supper.
such a happy guy today.
though the feeling of being broke really very siann.
but nvm. i shall find work. today.
i will find one. right? RIGHT-ED!
and ohh. jonathon.
let me do a countdown for u.
its 11 days yeahhh.
and dun forget our deal.
a treat arhhh!
i will be waiting!!!
oh yeahhh. before i forget. not to mention.
DA XIAO JIE!
finally arhh, u are so much better.
i can really feel it, by listening to u on the phone.
so much better than the day before.
take some time to calm down ok?
and heyy. dun, DUN, call me XIAO DI DI.
sounds so .... crap.
though i really younger than you. but then no need like that right.
i noe u jealous that i younger.
LOlz.
today so guai stay at home arhhh, really first time i see u stay home.
dun worry lahh, when i get pay. and i get out of my fianicial crisis, i will treat u de.
looking at the time. that makes me left with only 6 hrs of slp.
i dun know how i'm feeling.
it just can be expressed into words.
sometimes i really dun know if i am feeling happy, or just making myself happy.
have no one to blame, other than myself.
life is so dull.
when will the rainbow appear again.
maybe it will, maybe...
but till then, i shall wait patiently.
appreciation of the fine and beautiful things to life.
and ohh yahh. before i forget.
ai lingg!!
bon voyage yeahhh.
hmmm. really want to send u off de.
but thenn.
too bad lah. tml need go find job.
dun worry. the OUTs instructors will always miss you.
... i say it on their behalf.
:P k lahh. dun forget our little gifts arhhh.
especially mine. LOlz.
remember .. u still got a camp coming ok?
yups. ok i end here. 6 hours 30 mins left to slp...
and windy and cooling night it is .. yeahhh.
cause it is raining outside.
block my night scenery ehhh.
my MOON!!.
ciaos evryone. and have a good day ahead.
``Sun Sets at : 12/08/2005 02:51:00 AM
Wednesday, December 07, 2005
WEEE! i skip work today.
LOlz.i meann, i think about it.
dun wan lahh. sell cream.
very stress. another thing is maybe i am not the material lahh.
life still goes on. right? RIGHT-ED
maybe i shall FLYYYY FIRST!!
just thinking of the ad that malaysia is having sale makes me more happy.
just wondering if food will be cheaper.
:D weee. camp briefing was lyk so cute lahhh.
and its tml!! cant wait cant wait.
i want to see those chubby little boys and girls.
thinking back of my life. i wish i was back in my primary school life.
so relax. but one thing bad. NO POOL!
so i prefer to stay 16.
so tml i shall go job hunting AGAIN!.
any one wanna come?
so near yet so far.
probably it is just fate?
but nvm, i still guess life is all about happinness.
and sharing it with all that is around you.
things happen for a reason. and there is a lesson to be learn behind evrything.
hope you really find ur mr.right soon.
u will always have my blessing and support.
maybe it be the darkest night filled with storms, i will always still be there with u.
so dun be afraid to look for me ok?
and yes. da xiao jie. this is a whole section for u.
dun worry so much bout it lah.
i mean. nvm lahh. maybe he has his own reason ok?
let me see. since for the past few days, u were always there for me.
this time let me be there for u bahh.
if u need to go down to our "moonluft"again... call me anytime ok.
wo hui sui chuan sui dao.
my phone is available for u 24/7 and whole year round.
maybe today afternoon? since i am really free.
haiz. yi fen qing, yi fen ai.
jiu shui yuan bahhh.
u always tell me must kan kai. u must also ok?
maybe we are still caught in the same rain, and still not able to walk out.
but nvm, one day we will sure be able to find the way out de. RIGHT?
i dun noe lahh.i am not good in words. so cant console ppl.
but nvm. tml we go walk walk.
sure will feel better de.
since i am used to being others "mobile receiver."
kk.i shall not slack and continue typing on with my proposal.
u must be yourself soon ok?
i dun wan a restless girl partnering me ok?
LOlz.kk. ciaos my dear..... BLOG!.
``Sun Sets at : 12/07/2005 01:23:00 AM
Tuesday, December 06, 2005
let me see. its a brand new day!
from tml onwards, i shall start working, i hope so.
hope i pass my test tml.so that i can earn enough money to go aboard.
i am so despo to leave singapore!
hey rachel, i really thank you for recommending me this song lahh.
it really suits me.
-.-" though its kinda old. but nvm.
hmmm. i think u carry on with ur trip lahh.
i earn enough money le then i shall go on my own.
i shall go explore the whole malaysia!!
TIOMAN!!
maybe i will really find my life there.
i hope so.
and oh yeahhh.
i receive a mail from christine ma'am again!!
WEEE!!! ANOTHER CAMP!
this time i am assigned to the Songs and leisure instructor.
mostly the campfire part...
really happy!!.
i browse thru the songs and mostly i have learn them lahhh.
so no problem teaching bahh.
I ASK MY LOVE!!!!
and and and, permission is given to make a fireball or sparks!!
finally i get to make some romance atmosphere!
for the campers i meann..
and whats more important.
ITS IN SENTOSA!!!
the beach the beach and more beach.
da xiao jie arhhh, u promise to pei me hor..
cannot leave me alone.
and just only, i found out that my life that i have led so far.
is so wasted living of, in another words, i am a FAILURE IN MY LIFE!
just so hard to imagine, words like this could actually come out from u.
actually, i really wanted to persist on, cause i really cant let go.
but this just cant be brought across to u.so i guess, this is fate.
there is just a thousand things that i just cant bring myself to say it. this time i really submit to fate.
Your words, just so bring me down the the extend, then i really think i am not going to stand up again.
i believe ur words must have been really true, since u said that. AND FROM TODAY.
I MELVIN WONG! HEREBY STATES THAT I AM GOING TO LIVE MY LIFE TO THE FULLEST!.
this is the second and last time that i am going to feel so depressed.
NO MORE!!
i am not contradicting myself. but yeahhh.
i just need to calm down right. RIGHT-ED.and rachx, if u reading this. MUST PEI ME OK!.my off days should be booked by you.
just pei me walk walk can le.
``Sun Sets at : 12/06/2005 12:54:00 AM
Monday, December 05, 2005
Its been 4 months since the last post.
since now i am so free. shall start to blog again.
i mean i try.
i lost all my links.so maybe need some time to relink all of u. so if u guys are back here, pls tag on the tagboard leaving ur add ok?
after my secondary life, i meann, life feel so meaningless to me.
O's was crap. but i seriously hope for some results.
maybe what the others said was right lahhh.
i really have no LIFE other than npcc.
i am walking down the same road as my sis.
no idea.guess maybe nxt june i go for the interview?
hopefully i got the time bahhh.
PROM !!. hmmm, it was over lahhh, but seriously funn, but i still like the shopping part of it better.
hmmm, still finding a job. i am so dead broke.
my parents allow me to go overseass...!!!
but thennn, i think since they agreed, i must show some kind of independence rightt? RIGHT-ED.
maybe i will work for the money and go enjoy myself lor... and heyyy, my cousin, u PROMISE ME EHHH.
LOlz. i dun wanna go alone.
MALAYSIA!!. let me see, should i go shopping?.
NOT ONLY GIRLS PAMPER THEMSELVES, GUYS DO SO TOO. right? RIGHT-ED!
so i going to "pamper" myself with food. hopefully can gain some weight.
arhhhh. so going to give australia a miss...
too late to regret, nvmm one day, i will be on that big island on my own.
singapore is just so bored to me. other than suntec, the town, explanade, padang, clarke quay.
singapore is just so .. small to me.
but nvm, guess i will miss this city soon.
ahh yess. da xiao jie, u r next. hmmmm, really thanks for "giving up ur trip" for me ok?
though not going together, but still can find u de lahh. theres always a PHONE. right? RIGHT-ED.
i am so reduced to the state, that even a primary 6 student could console me..
but nvmm, thanks campers ok?
will get some things for u guys de.. ok.. girls.LOlz.
enjoy till ur seconday life start ehhh. MUST JOIN NPCC!
and arhhh, saying bout this.. rachel arhhh. nxt time arhhh, i tell u thingss, cann keep to urself?
dun so fast spread lahhh, must wait for me...-.-"
and oh ya... really worried for my npcc-buddies.
JONATHON, BEN.
good luck for ur N' results ok.
dun worry, u will make it de.
right? RIGHT-ED
nxt year must see u arhhh. if not. npcc in peirce is so quiet le..
yeah yeahh. job hunting.will hunt for one soon.
i meann, hunting in process.
oh ya. and the red star big prize award... MY OU XUAN!! LOLz.
though i only made one vote.. but nvm.. at least i contributed.LOlz
waiting, waiting waiting, just for that tree to reach for its sunlight.
used to be the leaves to absorb sunlight, but now.. after winter.
all i can say is that i do belong to the tree. and always will.
to beautify it further, it had to shed its leaves. right?
very "deep" rightt.? not composed by me de. read it from a mail.
rach used to say, i am always a kind of one sided love affair guy.
maybe this just suits me better.
arhhhh!!! i am so late for my appointment... gotta go interview le. if i there goes my trip!
ciaos-
``Sun Sets at : 12/05/2005 10:47:00 AM
